How to Take Charge of Your Self-Esteem

Liking ourselves, feeling like we're good people, not just with good potential, but a pretty solid current way of being, is crucial for overall wellness.

This video from The School Of Life lends a perspective on what contributes to self esteem levels, so you'll be in a better position to take charge of it.

If you aren't able to view the video, or would like to further contemplate the points discussed, read on, here are the three main contributors to your self esteem:

1. What Your Parents Did

Think about your mom if you identify as female, or your dad if you identify as male. What did he or she do for work? Not only does your parent's attitude toward work matter, but what they actually did plays a role in who you are today because it set the standard for you. Are you doing better or worse than he or she? If you're doing better in more ways than one: more money, success, power, etc. then you're probably pretty happy. However, if your same sex parent was a multi-millionare CEO, and you're pulling in a comfortable but not extravagant salary, that may be a barrier to your happiness worth delving in to and making peace with.

2. What Your Peer Group is Up To

Your friends, neighbors and classmates or coworkers... what are they up to, and how do you measure up? Chances are, if your childhood friends stayed in your home town and are working a minimum wage job, then you may feel pretty good about being in the same situation, or up-leveling. If, however, one of your classmates wins a Nobel Peace Prize, you may second-guess where you are in your life, and need to give yourself some TLC and new goals to strive toward.

3. The Kind of Love You Received as a Child

Were you valued only when you got good grades and agreed with everything your parents instructed? Or did your parents or caretakers give you a sense of unconditional love, regardless of what you did? More unconditional love is correlated with a more secure sense of self esteem. Conditional love from our parents requires us to come to terms with our constant striving, and find some sense of security and acceptance in our effort, unrelated to our inherent worth.