The 1 Habit That Could Be Making You Unlikable

You may be wondering – Oh, okay, thanks for letting me know about that. As I was saying, you may be wondering which (surprisingly common) habit – yeah, it's in the freezer, just look past the peas. Ehem, well I've lost my train of thought now, but you get the idea. Nobody likes this: being interrupted. 

You could take the time to read self-help books on popularity, do nice things for people every chance you get, or hey, you could even bake for people 'just because,' but ya know what? If you interrupt people, it will all be for naught, and you will ultimately not be liked. Why is that? People want to feel and be heard. It's the step before being understood. Which is the step before feeling connected, which breeds contentment, peace and happiness.

Why is it a problem?

If you need more reasons to validate why interrupting is something to gain an awareness of, and interrupt your thought process that has made this toxic pattern stick, here are a few reasons to cut out the cutting in.

To start, people get defensive when they're interrupted. They don't think you care what they think... so why should they listen to you? Instead, model the behavior you'd like to be on the receiving end of, which is being heard, understood, and hopefully liked or loved for who you are.

Not only will people be less likely to listen to you, they may disengage all together. A hostile environment is created when someone learns that their conversation partner will not take the time or care to listen. If there's no positive reinforcement for expressing one's self, then the expression is diminished, and disconnection is likely to result.

How to stop?

Start by putting input before output. Listening before speaking. And when someone else is speaking and you find yourself rehearsing what you're about to say, take a deep breath, and focus on what is being said in real life versus your mind. Then, when your conversation partner has paused, allow an extra moment or two in case they have anything to add, and then address what they said before adding your own input or switching the subject.