It’s happened time and time again. Folks getting caught up in their lies. #SMH

But you find amusement in how bae will try to maneuver their sneaky, slithering self out

of explaining how all those heart eye emojis got under five of his Instagram pics.

Seeing your boo squirm when you already know what’s up has become a hobby of

yours. Yup, your petty AF! #AdmitIt

You can’t help but call attention to people’s shortcomings with your subtle jabs. And boy, are they jabs. You don’t hold back on your punches.

Your friend has been trying

to get you to go on that road trip, but you can’t help but wonder how they’re going to make that shake since they’ve been unemployed for the last 3

months.

And your auntie who seems to call you out for not keeping a man? Well, you don’t hold your tongue for anyone, but you technically still have to respect

her, so you ask her how her boyfriend’s wife has been instead.

Hey, if she can’t understand how you’ve been in singledom for the last 2 years, then you

just strike back by letting her know you can’t understand how she’s been sharing her man for the last 6 months. Simple as that.

You don’t @ folks, but it’s pretty clear who you’re referring to when you call someone out on twitter. And everyone’s here for it.

From “liking” that tweet where your

best homie was hyped up about going out with her co-workers to that club you weren’t invited to join in on to responding to your frenemy’s engagement announcement with an,

“About time!” tweet, you seem to have conniving twitter thumbs.

The last tinder date you kicked it with was so late to that movie you were beyond hyped to see, that you couldn’t let your CP-time cyber interest off the

hook that easily.

So, you invited him out on a “more intimate” date at your home, all while giggling to yourself as you imagined him pulling up to that wing

cafe spot instead of your crib. 

 And you do this all in the name of karma. 

When your granny gathers with her church friends to “catch up,” you can’t help but to ear hustle for the tea on her friends’ grand kids as well. That one

girl who used to show off in the children's choir?

You find delight in the fact that her grandmother is telling everyone in the church that she’s grown up to

be quite the hussy. 

The ironic part about your pettiness, is that it all reads through your body language. You really don’t have to say a thing, but you sure choose too. If that’s

not petty, we don’t know what is.

Online, you’re damn near a troll, commenting under chicks’ pics with foolery like, “Why don’t you have any full-body pics on your page?” as opposed to hitting her in her

DM’s.

SMH completely unnecessary. 

You exclaiming that you’re okay when you’re really not is like a test for you to weed out the people in your life who really love and care about you.

In your mind, that is.

But no one is fooled by your silent treatment and cold shoulders. Those who know the real you understand that you’ll be back to your

normal petty self in the next hour or so.

You said you were okay when your boo forgot about that important work event you wanted to show boast them off as your arm candy, but they knew otherwise once

you broke your silence with, “I just think it’s funny how…”

That signature comment is literally the calm before the storm.

You manipulate the sh*t out of iMessage read receipts. You have them turned on exclusively for certain people in your phone, specifically the ones who take eons to hit you

back.

You literally find a thrill in waiting for that meaningful text from a late-replyer, just so you can leave them on “Read” for approximately an hour. It’s a skill

that you’re eerily adept at.