Do you want to go out on a lot of dates? Or do you want to actually find someone to be in a relationship with? Boy, if we could establish

that first, our dating situation would improve astronomically! Before agreeing to go out with more one person, take out a Sunday to sit on the couch with a journal and

write down what you want this year. If you don’t want to casually date, say that. If you’re tired of meeting random people who don’t share your values, jot that

down too. It’s actually a really good idea to put down the traits of what you’re looking for in a person. Here’s an example. If you don’t want to date

a struggling entrepreneur (because you’re one and you don’t have the energy to deal with two of ‘em), then if a friend says to you “Girl, I have the perfect

guy! He’s kinda broke right now because he’s getting his design company off of the ground…” you can already be like “Yeah, no thanks.” Or if you can’t stand children (some

people can’t) and a co-worker wants to set you up with a man who has three, why put him or yourself through the unnecessary torture? Knowing what you want ahead

of time really does save you---and everyone involved---a lot of time.

Sometimes people’s dating life sucks because they are comparing the current person to someone from their past. Or, they're still emotionally (and/or sexually) involved with someone in their past. You’re not

going to be able to move forward if you’re always looking back. If there’s an ex that you just can’t seem to shake, stop dating all together, get honest with

yourself and resolve that thing. If it looks like it can work, focus on that. If you know you’re living in a fantasy, work on getting over it. A lot

of women have wasted their precious time, energy and effort on trying to resurrect something that needs to stay dead.

Don’t sleep on online dating and matchmaking services. Reports indicate that as much as 40 percent of Americans online date and 20 percent of committed relationships actually started

online. No longer is there a stigma that it’s for “losers who can’t get a date”. Thanks to technology, it’s a way to meet people that you probably wouldn’t any

other way (click here for the reviews on the best ones). As far as matchmaking services, check out ones like Tawkify. It’s relatively affordable, but the really cool

thing about is there are no “Meet me at the downtown bar” with them. They go above and beyond to match you up with the right person and create dates

that put The Bachelor to shame. (Read more about them here.) Matchmaking is a cool option because you get to meet with someone personally so that they can

get a real feel for who and what you’re looking for. Almost like a best friend who is trained to hook you up. (Hey, it’s worth a shot.)

Your friends and family mean well, but you know what they say: “The road to hell is paved with good intentions” and just about all of us have been on

a date before that has felt like a living hell. You can bypass all of this drama by sitting your folks down and explaining to them what you want. If

they respect you and your time, they’re going to take notes. Then, if you hear them say “Hey, I want you to meet someone”, hopefully that ups the chances of

it being a person you’ll actually like.

It’s one thing to know what you want. It’s another thing to be so “in your head” that you sabotage possibilities before even getting started. Do they have to make

six figures? Do they have to be over six feet? Do they have to be in a particular line of work? When it comes to your list, it’s most important

to jot down what your values are. Yeah, don’t compromise those. Everything else? Be a little open-minded. Sometimes the kind of person you would’ve never considered ends up being the

one who is just the right fit.

This really can’t be stressed enough! Knowing the purpose behind why you’re going out on dates can also reduce the risk of wasting your time. If you want to be

in a long-term commitment, then the guys hitting you up on Tinder are probably not the ones to reply to. If you want to be married within a couple of

years and someone tells you on the first date that they don’t believe in marriage…what else is there to really talk about? Don’t apologize for having standards. Apologize for not

honoring them. If you know what you want and you’re not willing to compromise, it might not happen immediately…but in time, the right one will come. (Hold us to that!)