If all you keep saying is “I can’t stand her”, that’s not going to do anything but keep you in a negative space, put her on edge and (eventually) put

your man on the defensive. At some point, you’re going to need to find a way to keep the peace. Something that can get you on that road is to

write down the things that you don’t like about her. For instance, if it bothers you that she talks about you behind your back to your sister-in-law, now you know

what the problem is and you can work towards finding a solution. (Like asking your sister-in-law to draw the line with her when it comes to you.)

You’ve got a married friend somewhere who can totally relate to your situation. What’s good about that is you can go to her from some advice on how to handle

your mother-in-law. She probably has some suggestions that you never even thought about before talking to her. And, since she’s a trusted source, you have someone to vent to who’s

not in the family and won’t tell a soul.

Some women get really frustrated with their mother-in-law because they want a relationship that is very similar to a mother and daughter. If that happens, that’s special. But don’t automatically

expect it. You have a mother. Mother-in-laws are not there to mimic or replace that. You can have your own unique relationship, but the less you compare and contrast, the

less disappointed you’ll be.

You and your husband are a team. So yes, he should have your back. If your mother-in-law is disrespecting you, at some point, they should have a conversation about boundaries.

Sometimes moms are so overbearing, they need their sons to remind them that he is not a little boy anymore. Speaking of boundaries, don’t constantly harp on how much you

dislike your mother-in-law to your man. Yes, he’s your husband, but that’s also his mother. Disrespect can go both ways.

There’s a chance that the reason why your relationship with your mother-in-law is so shaky is there are misconceptions that you both have about one another. The best way to

tackle that is to spend some quality time together. Alone, if possible. Going shopping, having lunch or doing something that you know she likes (even if you don’t very much)

sends the message that you want her to be a part of your life and, to a certain extent, even your marriage. Be a big girl, take the first step.

Mother-in-laws usually have a soft spot somewhere. You just have to find it.