If the two of you have time to check out a documentary, watch 51 Birch Street. It’s about a man who shoots footage of his parents and all

of the secrets that unfold. Bottom line, just because two people are living together and raising a family, just because they’re not trying to kill each other, that doesn’t mean

they’re happy. It’s always a good idea to ask your spouse if they are. Not just with you, but in general. Happy is good.

When the two of you first got together, did you want to conquer the world? Maybe you wanted to start your own business or non-profit? Or, maybe you’ve been talking

about building a dream house or even getting out of debt. Healthy relationships have goals, even for the relationship itself. Did the two of you lose sight of those? Ask each

other if where you are is truly where you want to be. Or are you just caught up in the day-to-day routine of life?

Someone once said that good sex in a marriage is 10 percent of it while bad sex is a marriage is 90 percent. What they’re getting at is the tone

of the bedroom usually speaks to how the relationship is going. Sex is about intimacy, communication, making a connection and pleasing each other. Sure things (including bodies and libidos) change

over time. But overall, how’s the sex? Again, don’t assume. Ask.

A mistake that a lot of people make is giving their partner what they want rather than what their partner actually needs. For instance, say that you like to receive

cards as a sign of affection and so you get your spouse one. Only, he’s not really moved by it. Now your feelings are hurt. Rather than going on the

defensive, ask him how he likes you to express your love for him. He might prefer if you went to a game with him or came to bed naked more

often. Love is about meeting someone’s needs. Even if they differ from your own.

No matter how strong a relationship may be, it can also be made stronger. Maybe you need to get up 30 minutes earlier to just lay in bed and talk.

Maybe he’d like it if you didn’t tell your friends so much about your personal business. Maybe he wants sex to be more creative (and you’ve been waiting for him to

bring that up!). No matter how much time you spend with someone, never assume you know all of what they’re thinking. Especially when it comes to a question like this

one.

Again, each anniversary is a milestone. But it's not just about the fact that you’re still together. Make some plans so that your lives together only continue to get better. That’s

how you keep the enthusiasm alive. Want some ideas on how to live big as a married couple? Click here.